I think inspiration runs in a circular motion so here’s to hoping I can inspire all the incredible gals as much as they all inspire me. Badass Women is a series about capturing that positive energy and spreading it. Wanna help? Read about these cool girls and share their features with the women that inspire you!!
What is your relationship with beauty?
Well, often I just wear t-shirts/plain tanks and leggings/jeans with my kicks (usually vans or when I am near the coast, Flip Flops). What goes on with my face is nothing most of the time. If I do anything for during the day I go with moisturizer and mascara and then brush my eyebrows. Squirt some body spray and use deodorant and I am ready.
There are times though when I like to take out my only eye shadow palette and foundation and go all out. I am more of a simplistic gal I believe, and one day soon to be more classy and clean cut but with my edge.
What’s the first thing you do when you wake up in the morning?
When I wake up in the morning I usually check my phone. But recently I have changed to charging my phone away from my bed so I don’t go on social media when I wake up. I lay in bed for a good 30-45mins (I am trying to work on it) until I get up and shower and get ready for the day.
I also have a roommate who wakes up a little before me most of the time for classes. There are times though where I have to yell at her to go to class which ends up with laughs and giggles. We talk, stay in touch, and jam out whenever we get that chance which gets me going on my day as well.
Name 3 things that inspire you.
Music, Knowledge, Outdoors, Certain People (Ok, so this is more than three...I am not sorry)
If you could give advice to yourself as a ten-year-old, what would you say?
This was during like 4th-5th grade right? Although I already follow these ideas now, I would tell my ten year old self to never hate and to always be serious about what is true to yourself.
What’s something you can’t live without?
Damn…Music? It has proved to do a lot to a human's life and well, it definitely has for mine. It provides me beauty in life and strength within.
Where did you grow up?
I was born in Russia and adopted at the age of 3 by an American couple along with my sister who was 4 years old. We lived in the Orange country area, from what I heard, surrounded by lovely neighbors and friends.
We then, a year later, moved to Carlsbad, California and grew up in a nice home and with lots of opportunities. Although we went through personal family struggles, we always were grateful. When my parents divorced my Junior and Senior year of high school my mother and I moved Inland and my dad stayed on the coast and my sister relocated to Arizona. I am now in New Orleans furthering my education and am very lucky to do so.
How old are you?
19 but I believe I don’t associate with age. It has always gotten in my way growing up so it has a bad taste in my mouth.
What are you passionate about?
Although, I have been distant from my motivations for a small while, I have been learning to find my ambitions again everyday. Music Business and my future are the top two things. Other ideas flutter throughout my mind but I keep those to myself and people will just have to observe what I have in mind. Being spectacular within my passion is the one thing I have always dreamed about constantly since I was a little girl.
Talk about the most challenging thing you’ve overcome, how did you do it?
I am going to be selfish on this one because out of all the tragedies and disappointments in my life, which are multiple handfuls, my first break up of a long term relationship had to be the one that has hit me the hardest. The pain that you experience never really diminishes. It's hard. And no matter what people tell you about how you will get through it, you don’t care at the moment. You care about the pain and the memories and the person. You logically understand what you are told and how things will play out, but emotions and your feelings do not match up and that’s what gets to you.
Keeping busy helps, distancing yourself helps until you get stronger, and speaking to friends and focusing on yourself always keep it to be just OK.
Coffee or tea?
Tea usually but I do buy a lot of sweet coffee drinks and recently my favorite is a Spanish coffee called “Cafe Bustelo.”
What quote inspires you the most?
There is this quote, actually an album name of an artist, Courtney Barnett. I do not usually listen to her but this quote stood out to me and I believe it is because this is who I am.
The quote “Sometimes I sit and think, and sometimes I just sit” describes what I do. I think often but I also just like to sit and observe. I am still figuring out what drew me towards this quote but there is something about it that I just instantly felt connected to.
What song makes you feel like you can accomplish anything?
Wow, this is tough. Hmm. I would have to say “Let's Groove” by Earth, Fire, + Wind because it has this inspiring bump to it that makes you feel like you can dance throughout life.
Follow Korina on Instagram: @korinaday
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One thing that a lot of people don’t know about me is that I have anxiety. When I was younger, panic attacks would prevent me from doing things like going to class, sleepovers, or traveling. My family was always there to support me and around the age of 10 or 11 I met with a counselor for a few months to try and learn ways that I could cope so that I could be the unstoppable young girl I dreamed of being.
For me, that path didn’t solve my problems, and it wasn’t until I was about 16 that I figured out methods of dealing with stress that were effective for me. Panic attacks diminished exponentially when I learned that my feelings are exactly that, mine. Always remember that you control how you feel, and even if it’s hard, you CAN fight off an accelerated heart rate, tears, and shakiness.
These opinions are entirely my own and my experience with anxiety is unique to yours. If you are truly suffering with anxiety, talk to a friend or family member about getting help. In the meantime, I’ve compiled a list of the successful ways I’ve learned to cope with my anxiety...feel free to give them a try and let me know in the comments how you deal with stress, panic attacks, and everything in between.
All the love
I created the artwork at the top of this post during junior year. The amount of detail can be overwhelming to look at ((especially as I was creating this)) and all of the negative space is intentional...a place to let your eyes and mind relax. This piece is meant to be reminiscent of what anxiety can feel like...so much can be going on all around you and in order to feel calm you need to find that empty space to relax. The large text reads ‘KEEP YOUR CALM’ a mantra I had at the time and still think of today. Find your own mantra to comfort and motivate yourself during stressful times!!
The most commonly recommended cure for stress, a good concentrated 10 minutes of deep breathing can be a lifesaver. My approach is the inhale for 10 seconds then exhale for 9 seconds, inhale for 8 seconds, exhale for 7 seconds and so one and so forth until I get down to 1. Normally I then do this breathing exercise in reverse and repeat the process starting at inhaling for 1 second, exhaling for 2 seconds, etc. Not only will the breathing slow down your heart rate, but focusing on counting will slow down your thoughts.
GUIDED MEDITATION VIDEOS
The hardest time of day for me when I’m in an environment I’m not comfortable in is night. I think the pressure of falling asleep stresses me out more and because when I’m anxious over an extended period of time I have trouble sleeping and I get so frustrated when I just can’t drift off because I know that a good night’s sleep makes life a million times easier to manage. This year I discovered the most incredible tool to help me calm down and snooze. On YouTube there is a plethora of guided meditation videos to choose from. Turn the brightness of your computer or phone all the way off once you’ve clicked play, pop in your headphones, and fall asleep. My favorite video is ((https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=uE70YE6NVEA)) but with so many to choose from you can definitely find which video suits you and your needs the best!!
I’ve never been medicated for my anxiety and don’t plan to ever be. I rely entirely on natural coping mechanisms and techniques. Essential oils are a natural, healthy, and beneficial way to help you feel calm. Lavender, cedarwood, ylang ylang, and chamomile are all good for relaxation. I keep a small glass roller full of a blend of relaxing essential oils that I apply to pressure points on my wrists, as well as under my nose when I’m feeling that initial tinge of anxiety.
SURROUNDING YOURSELF WITH FAMILIAR THINGS
If you get anxious when placed in unfamiliar situations keep in mind that you have the power to fill them with comfort. Whenever I’m traveling I bring my favorite pillow with me to make any hotel feel more like my room at home.
Senior year of high school I found this great website ((https://www.calm.com/)) where, for free, you can meditate to these relaxing gifs of lakes, flower fields, mountains, etc. with the soothing audio of nature to match. Personally, I like choosing a song I find relaxing on Spotify ((like No Woman by Whitney)), putting it on loop, choosing a scene and just focusing on one aspect of the gif until I feel calm again.
FINDING A PLAYLIST THAT MAKES YOU FEEL GOOD
Intuitively, it makes sense to listen to music you find calming but for me that doesn’t always quite work. You might not be in the mood to listen to your ‘Party Playlist’ but finding an album that has lyrics you can follow along and a slight happy edge will distract you more than listening to an all instrumental, but very soothing group like The Gentleman Losers. For some reason the new album by Glass Animals, How To Be A Human Being works really well for me. Let me know what songs or albums make you feel groovy again!!
If I’m in a funk the last thing I usually want to do is hang out with friends and get going but that is KEY. Make plans the night before so that you know you have something solid to do with your day and you’re not just sitting around trying to kill time. Go get brunch with a friend or take yourself to a movie. If you feel anxiety coming on late at night or at some time where you’re stuck where you are one thing I find really helpful is copying down song lyrics in a notebook...watching Netflix is too passive an activity and your thoughts just spiral back to stress, writing forces you to stop multi-tasking or multi-thinking and focus on spelling and memorization. ((Huge Secret: doing things to distract you from anxiety makes it go away!!))
WRITE DOWN WHAT'S BOTHERING YOU
A lot of times anxious thoughts are irrational. If you get anxiety going to the beach because of shark attacks write that down then do a little research to learn if that’s something to be so worried about ((it’s not)). Cross off every irrational thought and see what you’re left with. The remaining items should be easier to manage. Try to write down solutions to each rational problem and test them out!! Even if you can’t solve everything that’s getting you down, making progress is productive and will feel good.
CHANNEL DESTRUCTIVE ENERGY INTO CREATIVE ENERGY
I think one of the worst feelings is wanting to sabotage everything you’ve worked for and not caring about the consequences. Instead of neglecting to take care of yourself or straight up breaking things think about how you can channel all of that boiling negativity into something positive. When I’m in a bad mood I find it WAY easier to write and paint. Words flow from my fingertips to the computer screen and paint glides effortlessly from brush to paper. Once you’re done working on whatever creative pursuit you choose you’ll feel proud that you were able to channel those ugly feelings into a beautiful masterpiece.
My life has consistently changed in relation to the seasons. Having a friend almost exclusively for the deep stuff...feelings, conversations, and everything in between is imperative. In my life, that special gal is currently 8000 miles away. Thankfully that doesn’t stop us from talking and recently we fell into a deep hole considering how our lives are different than how we expected them to be.
During this call I came to the realization that winter, with its consumerist motives and oppressive weather is always the hardest time of year for me. I think that the feeling of nostalgia around the holidays for my childhood and the rain both trap me and make me feel incapable of making progress. In contrast, spring brings me a refreshed attitude, new opportunities magically present themselves, and the sun returns to nourish my soul...allowing me to grow with the flowers once again.
Annually this cycle occurs and with it come tides of emotions and new waves of characters. Learning to allow life to simply drift is huge. Remembering not to blame yourself during the lows is key. Life is comprised of ups and downs and nothing stays constant. Finding the beauty in the impermanence will allow you to free yourself of expectations of ‘forevers’ and appreciate what and who you have in the moment.
There are so many aspects to the drift: school, work, relationships...but I think the most relatable component is friendship. There are friends I've had my entire life and others who have lasted weeks...but I treat them all the same. In the film Waking Life that I find infinite lessons within, there is a scene about holy moments - mere instances in which you can perceive the sacred nature of a shared experience. Films, as the characters describe, have a way of presenting the viewer with the holy moment, cinematically framing it. However, in real-life while these times are easy to see in retrospect they are almost imperceivable as they occur.
This is in part because we imagine that there will be many more memories to come. After coming to terms with this ideology I taught myself to treat every shared experience with someone as a stand alone, one of a kind moment. This gave me the power to see how a casual coffee or powerful conversation might play a larger role in my life. I began to see myself and my friends as stars destined to cross paths and learn from one another. Viewing people in this way made me comfortable with the inevitable drift of life.
Stars fall out of orbit with one another and people do too; take the time to appreciate the holiness of the time spent in each other’s galaxy...because who knows the next time you will cross paths again.
It’s easy to feel hurt by the people who drift out of your life, but you have to keep in mind that you are also drifting. Everything is unstable which is scary but it makes life a hell of a lot more interesting. Imagine if the people in your life right now were the only people you’d know and love. There is a comforting stability in that, yes, but that idea lacks excitement...the thrill of new relationships would cease to exist and human connection would be limited.
On a small scale I find that it helps to just live your life and pay attention to the people who 1. You are drawn to or inspired by and 2. The people who seem drawn to or inspired by you. Those are the kinds of people you want to have in your life. If either of those 2 things change ((ie. that person you were inspired by is ignoring you, that boy who seemed cool is making you sad)) it’s time to keep drifting. And there is NOTHING wrong with that.
The more you connect with yourself, what drives you, what brings you fulfillment the more like-minded people you will connect with. Those will be the friendships that last. Allow yourself the freedom to drift free and don’t forget that everyone and everything else is drifting too. Go to the ocean to be reminded of how natural this process is, look up at the stars. The world has so much to teach us if we are willing to pay attention and learn.